Fundoo Times
Being a single mother is not a sin. Read out the article to explore more about single mothers and use given tips to live better life as a single mother.

Being a Single Mother

A child when comes in the world and opens its eyes; father and mother are the first to build a relation with it. They silently make a promise to protect the infant from evil and to instill a sense of responsibility towards society in the new born. Complementing each other, one (father) chooses to develop an analytical and practical view point in the infant towards life while the other (mother) takes protective role and instills the feeling of security and provides shelter against the unauthenticated world. The world is not uniform and so are the situations around people living in this world. There are women who have to develop within themselves the qualities of their counterpart since they are not fortunate enough to have their counterparts to complement them. Such women are single mothers caring and bringing up their children either by their own choice or by god's will.

It's not an easy task to replicate father. In other words, it takes more time and efforts for a woman to become father to her child and transcend the values and responsibilities expected from his/her as an individual. This all takes time, but it's not impossible. It just needs an open outlook towards yourself, your children, and towards world. It's about looking at sphere of your life with someone else's eye and making things work for you. It is not about struggling throughout the day with guilt for not having spouse to help you in the journey of life, but it is about looking at the rising sun with a smile on your face and hope for a better tomorrow. There are some tips which we would like to discuss with you to help you make your kids and your life better than before.

Tips for Single Mothers
  • First Thing First: As the only person in family who is responsible for routine chores and decision making, you need to prioritize things at your end. It will help you organize your life in a better manner; believe me, you will feel less stressed and more joyful.
  • Speak Up: Yes, there is no need to boil things within you. It’s good to take care of various matters by yourself, but sharing issues with your loved ones also works sometimes. You are not an angel, but a human being; and just like others you also have feelings and full rights to speak up. You could share your feelings with your friends, relatives, or counsellors.
  • Goal Formation: Since you are the one who has to take careof everything happening in your life, its better to frame a strategy on how you are going to proceed further. You need to find answers to questions; such as, what you want to inculcate in your children and how you can do that; where do you want your career graph to go and what are your action plans for the same. Always prepare short targets (daily, weekly, or monthly) to achieve the long term goals.
  • Maintain Friends: You need to be mentally secure and healthy to fulfil expectations of different people. Friends are the best doctors who give you a warm hug and then everything around you seems easy and in your favour. Have some close friends whom you can rely upon and with whom you can share issues haunting you day and night.
  • Feel Good: If you feel sad to think of your child who is not embraced with a father, then it’s really not something to feel guilty about. Make your child emotionally strong and nothing in the world could break him. For this, you have to exhibit the behaviour you want your child to show. Have a positive attitude towards yourself which is directly going to have a multiplier effect on your child. Make sure that you do not keep on complaining about the situation at your end, rather cherish your life and thank God for whatever he has blessed you with.
  • Mistakes are Teachers: Make your mistakes your teachers. Learn from them as much as you can. No one in the world is mistake free. Every one of us has gone through bad patch and has made some mistakes, but that does not mean to regret over past all the time. There is always an option to start. Learn from mistakes and do take care that you won’t repeat them again.
  • Follow Your Own Path: When you are living life of a single parent then you will find advisory banks in form of people around you. They may be your neighbours, relatives or, colleagues who will give you free advice and examples quoted from their life or their known’s life. Respect them, listen to them, and choose your own path; your very own plan. As all locks have different keys, same is with life; everyone has different life and thus need a different plan to succeed. So, plan out what is best for you and then the world will be yours.
  • Don’t Be Over Protective: Your kids are yours and will always be yours, believe it. Over protection will hamper their growth and eventually they may become rebellious to you. All your love and care will get nullified the time you start over protecting them. Always be on their side and let them decide what they want and how do they want. Whatever their plans are, discuss with them through a healthy communication and let them execute their plans. Assure them that they will not be ignored if failed and that your unconditional love is by their side whatever may be the situation.
  • Don’t Overload Kids With Responsibilities: Never do mistakes of assuming your 9 years old kid as a man. Make sure that your kids are not over loaded with expectations and responsibilities which their innocent heart can not carry. If you have a son, never ever assume him to take part in your household activities as your husband would have been assisting you. This will adversely affect his growth. Another better way is to give him small responsibilities and as he grows mentally and physically, delegate the responsibilities accordingly.